Dream Within a Dream

@_@

2009-11-05T23:54:58Z

Too tired, can't write, can't think, can't anything. @_@

WTF self?

2009-11-05T01:48:05Z

According to wordle, my current NaNo project's word cloud looks like:

The pairing is Zack/Cloud.

*cries*

Why is this happening?!

I effing swear

2009-11-04T23:14:24Z

Some people are fucking suicidal.

Dude, can you not take your evening run during fucking rush hour? Or better yet, move the evening run in the morning! And if you must run at night, how about wearing something that isn't black?!

Grar!

What is wrong with people these days?

Edit:

4008 / 50000 words. 8% done!
About 2.6k words behind. Glah.

Some more blatherings

2009-11-02T22:29:51Z

The thing with an on-going fandom, especially with canon that comes out slowly is that sometimes people just can't wait for the full story. And when that happens, people start growing attached to the characters before they know everything that's happened, start building elaborate back stories for these characters that they don't really actually know will be revealed some decades down the line and then BAM!

Canon disagrees.

Things can get pretty hard to swallow.

I know, for this is one of the reasons why Tezuka/Atobe pairing has been my OTP yet I feel less and less desire to write for it. Canon just fucks with my perception of these characters too much.

But this isn't about Tenipuri. No, this is yet another FFVII rambling.

I think it's fair to say that it's hard to truly grasp the characterization of characters whom you didn't create. While the story usually gives a good chunk of background, it's never the whole story. And trying to piece together the whole story when not given all the facts is down right difficult, impossible even when the author deliberately keeps things vague. In some ways, FFVII suffers this, especially Zack (oh Zack!).

First, I need to re-emphasize the importance Zack holds in the FFVII story. Advent Children Complete ends the movie with Cloud still thinking about Zack. That's pretty damn powerful right there. In fact, he thinks about him so much that he's brought back the flowers growing at the site of Zack's death so that he can part of the "nakama" group. Sure, the rest of the FFVII gang might not know Zack or only barely know of him, but for Cloud, Zack was/is important and FFVII is Cloud's story.

Now, admittedly, before Crisis Core there isn't a lot of information on Zack. We know that he's important to Cloud, that his behavior was something Cloud tried to emulate, and that he was what gave Cloud the strength to continue on ("Live. You are the proof that I existed." T^T) Hell, before Crisis Core, the best we got was knowing that Cloud took his buster sword from Zack and we didn't even know how important the Buster Sword really was!

But therein lies the advantage of coming into a fandom late. Not having gotten into the FFVII franchise until after the release of almost all of canon material (although apparently there's still more in the works), I don't have any pet theories to cling to. I call them as I see them and try to make my interpretation of the characters fit with all materials presented. Unfortunately for the older fans, after 10 years of liking a certain character, that character has mutated into something no longer resembling canon and when canon shows something that was not as how the older fans imagined, they decry retcon.

Yes fandom, I'm bitching at you.

Let's take another look at Zack.

The original game gives barely any actual information on Zack. We know his first name (his last name is unknown until Crisis Core), we know he saved Cloud's ass, we know he does squats when cooped up during travel and we known that much of Cloud's early behavior came from Zack. We also know that Zack was almost not affected by the mako and Jenova treatments while Cloud was heavily poisoned. We know that he was shot to death by three troopers who then left Cloud to die.

But the problem is we didn't know who really is Zack Fair? Oh, sure, we can deduce that Zack was probably quite powerful, was probably something of a friend to Cloud, had Sephiroth's grudging respect, and...that's it. Any more attempts at figuring out who Zack Fair really is becomes a minute dissection of Cloud's character, trying to separate the "Cloud" from the "Zack" and without all of the story at hand and being handicapped by Cloud's less than reliable narration/memory, the exercise is one of futility.

Until Crisis Core.

Crisis Core gives us Zack Fair as he was, unclouded (no pun intended) by mistaken memories and unbiased by any other character's personal interactions. We see his story in full and can finally begin a meaningful analysis of who is Zack Fair. And the fans cried retcon.

Two biggest problems I have with this debate:

1. Genesis is a rip off of Sephiroth. His story screws with the original canon!

I'm a little confused and find it rather absurd that people are angry at the Genesis subplot. (Yes, yes, Genesis was introduce in Dirge of Cereberus, sometime before Crisis Core, but bear with me.) Crisis Core takes pains to make sure that none of the FFVII crew ever even learns of the existence of the Genesis project. The entire conflict is Zack's fight and Zack's only. Furthermore, Genesis' story actually fills in the holes for the FFVII story, such as explaining where the monsters came from. An actual in-game canon explanation for why you need to fight monsters (science experimentation gone horribly wrong) is actually rarely found. Usually you're just expected to accept that monsters exist, the end, go whack something.

Suddenly monsters and creatures you fight aren't just some canon fodder. No, they've become almost tragic; humans who underwent too much modification and lost their humanity and thus becoming nothing but mindless killing machines. And it also explains why Sephiroth gone off the deep end after finding out his origin. Normal people go into shock at finding out that they are monsters, Sephiroth makes it a self-fulfilling prophecy. (BTW, Sephiroth is still crazy and evil in FFVII, this does not excuse his fangirls/bois.)

2. Zack is too immature!

My brain boggles. First, this is almost always from people who played half the game, aka when Zack was sixteen. Let me rephrase that, Zack is sixteen. Of course he's immature! The entire story is about him growing up, so you see his immature side first. Second, Zack is still described as being "like a child" even during the Nibelheim mission. He was never that mature to begin with. So why is everyone convinced that somehow Zack should be the paragon of virtue?

Oh, that's right, fanon. See what happens when you make assumptions about characters you know nothing about?

Another, more minor problem, is people's decrying that Zack facing off an entire battalion of Shinra grunts goes against the original FFVII hidden cut scene canon.

*takes a deep, deep breath*

So, so many things wrong with this assumption. Thing the first, the secret cut scene is from Cloud's point of view, which is already established as being quite shoddy at this point in the story. Two, the reason he doesn't see the entire battalion of Shinra grunts that Zack fights against in the final battle is because...get this, he never saw it. He has some sort of memory of it according to ACC, but not a lot and certainly not much memory of how taxing the fight was. Lastly, due to the graphical limitation at the time, one can chalk up the change due to technology rather than story telling. If anything, Crisis Core is the more canonical version of this particular story than FFVII's hidden cut scene.

In fact, most would agree that the Crisis Core ending made this scene far more emotional and clarified a shit ton of confusion thanks to Advent Children, but that's another kettle.

I understand that it's difficult to accept new material from canon that goes against preconceived notions/pet theories, but you cannot simply ignore it when the original creators pretty much came out and said that this specific part of the FFVII canon (Crisis Core) was ten years in the making. They simply ran out of room in the original story to get the full backstory out, thus resorting to a prequel. This is not retcon, because nothing is actually being changed from what it originally was. You cannot use retcon as an excuse to disregard everything about canon that you hate. It just doesn't work that way.

On the other hand, you're totally free to interpret a character however you damn well like and write fanfiction about it. Just be prepared to be called out on OOCness.

Now that I've gotten that stuff out of the way, I can get to the actual meat of the rant:

Zack and Cloud were good friends. Whether you interpret this as something more than friends, platonic, romantic, fraternal, what the fuck ever, you cannot deny that Zack and Cloud were good friends. To deny that would be to deny the impact Zack had on Cloud and that's just wrong.

Yes, Zack had only two instances in Crisis Core where he interacted with Cloud (three if you count a minor interaction during cadet training). Yes, we don't see much of Zack and Cloud interacting outside of missions. However, one has to remember that Zack has a life outside of Cloud. I know it hurts your yaoi fangirl heart that Zack doesn't exist solely to cheer Cloud on and has problems and demons of his own, but that's the canon. Zack has his own unique problems, has his own fucking job in the Shinra military, and he's as much as his own person as Cloud is.

But on the other hand, you cannot simply dismiss the fact that the two had a deep bond. While Zack is very much earnest and caring, he's not the type of person who will risk life and limb for an infantry trooper if he doesn't have some emotional attachment to the guy. He's also not going to randomly entrust his mentor's sword to anyone he saves. These actions speak louder than any prolonged interaction and establishes that Zack does indeed value Cloud as a friend (if not something more).

Conversely, I did mention the ending to ACC, yes? If Zack was nothing more than someone who Cloud was assigned to work with, why in the world would he keep alive Zack's memory by bringing his flower into his office? Why would he continue to be a delivery boy? Why would he continue to think of Zack at his lowest points in life? Zack is important to Cloud on an emotional level and to dismiss his importance is ignorant and unfeeling.

And because I need to drive this point home, notice in the following screencap:

Notice how there is a very obvious, very yellow flower in the foreground? Pay attention to that, because here's another screencap from the very next scene:

Notice how it is the exact same flower that grows on Zack's grave?

What do you think this symbolizes?

And finally, why do you think that ACC, a story supposedly about Cloud gets the following as the final last scene?

Because as far as Cloud is concerned, the beginning and ending of his story is Zack Fair.

If this cannot convince you just how important Zack is to Cloud, then I don't know what can.

Mrphgrm

2009-11-02T04:27:22Z

1049 / 50000 words. 2% done!

Yeah, not doing too well on my first day. ^^;

Also, no porn yet, am upset I haven't reached the fun stuff.

GIP

2009-11-01T03:48:40Z

OTP!

Um, I have nothing more to say. Just wasted an entire day watching AMVs and being all "bawl, Zack x Cloud is so baaaaaaaaaaawl!"

Yeah. I fail at life.

(On that note, I'm beginning to realize that a lot of my OTPs involve one half of the pairing dying horribly. I'm an awful person.)

Edit:
Cashew plans to NaNo again this year. Clearly, she's crazy, as she's super behind on things and really shouldn't be having time to NaNo. WTF self?

Note to self:
Attempt this kink that seems semi-abandoned...

Perfect RPG

2009-10-31T04:39:16Z

Cashew's perfect RPG would be a blend of the following:

FFVII's battle customization
Kingdom of Loathing's self-referential humor
Guild Wars' party flexibility
GaiaOnline's avatar customization
Pokemon's inventory management
Every other online games' special event items
WoW's mounts/pet system
And CLAMP's art.
Oh, and Chocobos. Those are a must.

Story? What story? XD

Sadly, this will never happen. *sigh*

ROFL

2009-10-31T00:23:44Z

I've never really got cosplay until...

The Battle You Never Saw

Quotes:
-"What are you waiting for?" "My time gauge to go up." *ding!*
-"Anime convention...tentacle monsters...I don't wanna get raped!"
-"Miss...miss...miss..." "Oh c'mon!" *punch* "9,999 dead."

And of course, it's sequal The Battle You Never Saw 2.0

Quotes:
-"I superglued them on." "Why?!"
-"So, bought us a summer home."
-"What the hell are we going to do about food?!" *WARK*

*giggles*

Heart rate 52

2009-10-30T19:10:53Z

My resting heart rate is 52 beats per minute.

*freaks out*

(P.S. Yes, that's on the low side.)

Edit:
Okay, they changed my medication so my heart won't beat quite so slow. *phew*

Impressive

2009-10-28T20:45:31Z

So finally got a chance to catch up on Tenipuri music, aka listened to Oki's new singing and the first impression is thus:

Why are the chords so awkward?

Don't get me wrong, some of the songs were pretty decent (not all of them, but it's Oki so even the weird ones weren't that bad), but they had the oddest arrangements. I'm not even talking about the general atmosphere of the songs, which it seems the composer can't decide on, but the fact that all of the new songs were just awkward to sing. There's these really weird minor scale jumps all over the place and generally notes that don't mesh in very well with the melody.

Not even going to touch on the oddness of the rhythms.

It's almost like whoever wrote the song was trying to be a bitch and make things hard.

But it's still somehow better than the first album.

Piracy and stuff

2009-10-28T16:19:35Z

Y'know, I'm pretty sick of the argument that piracy is killing [insert industry here].

The entire argument relies on the unfounded belief that if a person had no way of pirating the video/music/show/whatever, they would then shell out the money to buy the product.

This...this is a logical fallacy.

People who are willing to pay for a product will pay regardless. Those who aren't...would rather go without than shelling out the money for whatever medium they're looking for. Even if by some miraculous event the internet filesharing completely implodes on itself, sales are still not going to go up.

Legality of piracy aside, pirating is not the reason an industry is failing nor should it be the blame. Think of it this way: people can read books for free in a bookstore, it doesn't mean the books are being bought any slower or faster. Shrink wrapping a book simply puts off the customer base, because they can't go through and see if they enjoy the content enough to want to own the material.

Personal anecdote: I can have the entire collection of Sherlock Holmes for free on the interwebs, legally. I still shell out the money to buy the complete edition because I love the books so much. This buying has nothing to do with the availability of a free version and everything to do with the perceived worth of the material I'm buying. In other words, a manga series collection is not worth buying at the same price of a 1000 paged volume of The Complete Collection of Sherlock Holmes and there's no way you can convince me otherwise. Similarly, if a single DVD out of a 12 volume DVD collection is going to cost me $20 to buy with substandard subtitles, well, it's just not going to happen. Sorry.

Scaling fish

2009-10-28T00:10:47Z

Usually, when I buy whole fish, the marketplace person helps me to scale it before I take it home, thus saving me hours and hours of work. Today, unfortunately, the usual person was not there, instead a deli dude was filling in. This, of course, meant he didn't know how to scale a fish.

Which meant I had to do it.

The thing is, while I've watched my mom do it many times when I was little, I've never actually learned how to scale a fish. It turns out that scaling a fish is far harder than it looks. First, the fish is slippery, so getting a good grip is nigh impossible. Next, the fish has spines along its back and stomach, causing me to accidentally stab myself on said spines when my fingers slipped. Last, scales don't actually come off that easily and tends to spray all over the place when they finally do come off.

Needless to say, I had to clean up a huge mess.

But damn was fish yummy. ^_^

Uematsu Nobuo is overrated

2009-10-25T22:57:49Z

Okay, here's the thing, this selection of 5 best games soundtracks pretty much outshines everything from Uematsu that I've heard yet, and I'm listened to hours of his "representative" works.

The thing is, I know a lot of gamers tend to associate good music with certain epic scenes during the game, thus latching on said pieces of music as being great and whatnot, but good music should stand on its own merit. Even though I haven't played any of the games from which the top 5 list came from, I can't help but adore the sample that I hear. Not so much with Uematsu pieces that leave me going, "Okay, lots of cacophony, now what?"

In fact, the linked list of songs is one of the few lists that I can listen to and actually say the music is well composed. It's rather depressing when I go through top ten lists of gaming music only to find myself with a headache thanks to bad choices.

Getting old

2009-10-25T21:14:41Z

Was doing some stretches and tried a cartwheel. Could still do it, but was totally fearful of my neck the entire time. Then tried some bridges and basically felt my back give out.

I used to be able to do these at the drop of a hat. Not so much anymore, I guess. >.<

GIP

2009-10-25T02:30:12Z

Because I saw a crop and decided I wanted a colored version. *shifty eyes*

Top 10 Gaming Snacks

2009-10-24T22:51:35Z

Because this is relevant to Cashew's interests for two more months, maybe. :p

Also, blatant ripoff, oh yeah.

Quick note: Some major considerations for a qualifying gaming snack includes...

1. Ease of eating (i.e. will it get the controller messy or interrupt with my game?)
2. Ease of preparation
3. Ease of clean up
4. Pricing
5. Availability

Without further ado, the list.

#10 - Bubble Tea mmm, tea!

Pros:
- Tapioca bubbles fill you up
- Has liquid so you don't suffer dehydration
- Comes in many different flavors
- Doesn't spill as much as unsealed cups.

Cons:
- Squishy cup difficult to hold
- Some find it hard to drink from the larger straws
- Expensive!!! (Anywhere from $1 to $7/cup depending on location)
- Will spill if not handled with enough care

#9 - Takoyaki is it any surprise Japan has great gamer foods?

Pros:
- Quick to prepare if bought frozen
- Has seafood
- Balanced meal
- Clean and easy to eat with bamboo picks

Cons:
- Slow and messy to prepare if not bought frozen
- Sauce can start dripping all over controllers
- Always fighting for the last one
- Has seafood (i.e. not kosher)
- Hard to find if there's no Asian stores around

#8 - Waffles bites yummy!

Pros:
- Comes in many flavors
- Easy to prepare
- Nutritious if not balanced
- Clean to handle if eaten with a fork

Cons:
- Syrup can get messy
- Cools easily if not eaten right away
- Bite sized ones can be difficult to find
- Requires utensils

#7 - Sushi (maki rolls) not the fancy ones, we're talking simple rolls.

Pros:
- Clean and easy if not using sauces
- Extremely nutritious
- Filling and satisfying
- It's sushi, people!

Cons:
- Super expensive!!! (Can get as expensive as $40 for a decent meal)
- Raw fish, some people can't stand it
- Will be super messy if using soy sauce (which you shouldn't, by the by, that ruins the sushi flavor)
- Requires driving out for them/cannot be stocked at home

#6 - Candy especially gummies and chocolate.

Pros:
- Wrapped, will not be messy
- Sweet!
- Easy to purchase and prepare (what preparation?)
- Extreme variety to choose
- Super cheap

Cons:
- Not filling
- No nutrition to speak of
- Rots teeth

#5 - Tater Tots po-ta-to!

Pros:
- Very filling
- Very cheap
- Piping hot, especially good for late nights
- Easy to eat with fingers or toothpick

Cons:
- Only one flavor
- Can get messy during twitch reflex games

#4 - Pizza rolls you know you love them!

Pros:
- Very filling
- Pretty cheap
- Hot food for those late night gaming
- Fast preparation
- Easy to eat with toothpicks, not so much fingers
- Many flavors for the picky
- Cheese!

Cons:
- Accidents can happen (especially if you don't eat the bite whole)
- Tomato sauce a bitch to clean if not cleaned right away
- Artery clogging

#3 - KFC popcorn chicken or any other bite sized fried chicken bits.

Pros:
- Quick to eat
- Mostly mess free if left inside the box
- Pretty darn cheap
- Super filling
- High protein value
- Usually warm and crispy
- Comes with different flavorings

Cons:
- Messy if using sauces
- High fat content
- Requires driving out for them/cannot be stocked at home

#2 - Steam buns Chinese food FTW!

Pros:
- Steaming hot
- Lots of flavors to choose from
- Balanced meal
- Easy to eat with fingers
- Frozen ones are quick to prepare
- Super filling
- Cheap ($5-$7 for 12 palm sized buns)
- It's Chinese, who doesn't like Chinese?

Cons:
- Some flavors not kosher
- Can cause burnt fingers if impatient
- Can be slightly unwieldy
- Can be hard to find if there's no Asian stores around

And the king of gaming snacks is...

#1 - Pocky you know it in your soul!

Pros:
- Quick and easy to stock
- Can be found in almost any gaming or grocery store
- Has special "handle" to avoid messing up fingers with chocolate coating
- Many, many different flavors and sizes
- Can be very filling with larger boxes
- Has chocolate
- No preparation needed
- Super easy to clean (toss box and wrapper in trash, you're done)
- Doubles as dare games if the video game starts to tire you out
- Addictive to eat

Cons:
- Addictive to eat, you cannot stop at just one box

List your favorite gaming snack and see how they stack up against my list. ^_^

=.=

2009-10-23T21:45:42Z

Perm accounts are going at $40 bucks.

I overpaid by $10. *wants $10 back*

Ah well, regret and hindsight. :p

In FFVII news, I'm beginning to see why people bitch so much about the storyline. I mean, it's not exactly that bad, at least not by industry standards, but does boggle the mind as to why heroes who are trying the save the planet from being smashed into smithereens have time to spend hours and hours racing chocobo for breeding. Wouldn't it have made more sense to allow the player to play the mini-games after defeating Sephiroth? Or earlier in the game, y'know, before the whole tragedy twist thing.

You know what? Never mind. The fanfic is infinitely worse.

Also, just a quick question to those with more musical knowledge than I: What is the name of the piece playing in the background during the cutscene? I've gone through the entire OST for FFVII (and believe me when I say that takes time and effort and way too much energy), and I've yet to find a match. It's driving me crazy because I'm convinced Zack's theme is a re-arrangement of this piece.

Okay, what's with all this Cait Sith hate?

2009-10-22T01:26:56Z

Yeah, an FFVII entry that's not about Cloud or Zack, shocking, I know. (Although, knowing what I do about FFVII, I'm now playing the game and pretending that the voice in Cloud's head is actually Zack speaking from beyond the grave and still looking out for our emo hero. Hey, a girl can dream, can't she? I hope when the eventual remake comes - you know it's going to happen, no way Square Enix won't squeeze this cash cow then possibly butcher it when it's dry - they cast the voice with Suzumura instead of making Sakurai talk to himself. I mean, notice how the voices pretty much stop after Aerith dies? Clearly she's keeping Zack busy in the lifestream. *nodnod* Anyway.)

Here's the thing I never could understand: Why this irrational hatred for Cait Sith?

Look, I understand that when you're at that super important last battle and Cait Sith's slot lands on the epically failed party wipe, this can drive some gamers to crazy homicidal rages, it's still not good enough of a reason to hate him. After all, he is a chance character, and it's always a bit of fun knowing at any moment it could become a "rocks fall, everyone dies" moment. And besides which, if you truly are stupid enough to not abuse that save point before a boss fight, then you probably deserve the party wipe.

(Just to say, I'm probably feeling much less hatred due to the fact that I use both save points and save states on the emulator, but on the other hand, I got a game over on the first boss of epic easy, so yeah.)

Okay, so many the fanboys are just bitter that Cait Sith always screws with their meticulously planned battles while I find the idea hilarious and possibly adds some extra amusement. I enjoy protagonist torture.

On the other hand, I totally love Cait Sith for having a free weapon (megaphone! I can't be the only one to find that hilarious) that can load up 8 materias and allows me to level them up much, much faster (although I tend to abuse enemy skill because, hey, who wouldn't want free mp and healing?). This also frees up Cid so he can level up the "All" materia on his lances of doom. (I also love Cid for being completely unsympathetic to Cloud's mental issues. Hee! Moar wangst.)

Because after learning that mastering an "All" materia means I can sell it for 1.4 million currency and thus solve all of my money problems is very much yes. (I hate grinding for money so that I can mindlessly upgrade the party. Yes, I know I should consult the guide more carefully, but I just want to watch the cut scenes. Which is weird, because I tend to hate cut scenes in most games.)

Cashew hates shooter games

2009-10-21T01:29:52Z

Okay, Cashew does not profess to be a hardcore gamer nor even that much of a widely played gamer, or even countable amongst the "casuals", since Cashew's idea of gaming is sitting down and playing a game until real life comes knocking at the door and then stop for however many years it takes to get real life off her back then start again.

But here's the thing about games that I've managed to summarize up in my limited experience.

Shooter games, without exception, suck.

Now, I know, I know, some of the best games these days are first or third person shooters, but the thing is, I just can't play them.

As in, I physically cannot play shooter games. See, I have motion sickness. Even the act of watching a shooter game is enough to make me sick. Not because of the gore, oh no, it's the twisting and turning and camera adjustments that kills the game for me. I literally become motion sick when trying to play a shooter game.

Hell, it took me almost forever before I could even get used to Guild War's camera controls (which is to say, I leave it in one angle and never touch it again).

Maybe if they made more games like Duck Hunt I'll be able to start enjoying shooters again. W_W

Wow.

2009-10-19T06:17:55Z

FFVII Hey, Mickey!
FFVII Ouran
FFVII Nandemonai dance
Cloud goes to the convenience store
Birthday Cloud
Cloud Be Happy
FFVII Danjo
Crisis Core Lucky Star opening
Crisis Core Utena
FFVII Compilation Code Geass R2 ending
FFVII Compilation Baccano opening
FFVII Compilation Kodomo no Jikan
FFVII Heaven and Hell w/ guest stars
Dissidia Caramelldansen
Dissidia Build up with Protein

And now for something completely different:
Pikachu Dango

Taichi

2009-10-18T20:36:59Z

Some may know, my mom's basically forcing me to practice taichi *shudders*. Now I know all the basic moves, but my form is horrible and I wobble like an ugly duckling.

Here's how the routine looks, ideally.

In reality, of course, I look horrible. XD

*goes to practice a little more before fainting from exhaustion*

(P.S. Taichi is actually very strenuous, although some might not think so. The entire style is developed to practice muscle control and more muscle control, so by the time you're done, your legs feel like jelly from holding one position too long. ;_;)

Edit:

And speaking of Taichi, Wudang training (lightness training, or midair acrobatics).

Wudang Swordsmanship (from what I've learned, the most difficult part is to avoid smacking your face with the tassel)

And if I hear one more comment about how the katana is superior to the Chinese Jian, I'm gonna hit a bitch. (Look, they were designed for different types of battle styles, but still, the jian is actually a rather important weapon during war time for good reason.)

"Shing!" of sharpness.

Sword eye candy. (Yes, I have an obsession with cold steel weaponry.)

Edit2:

The Play - because Tanith never seen it. o.O

Ask That Dude In The Suede

2009-10-18T19:42:47Z

Q: What killed the dinosaurs?

A: It's not 'what' but 'who'.

Oh god, ow. He knows PoT. He's seen PoT.

Ahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahah!

No wonder he has so many fangirls. *cackles harder*

Happy B-Day Tanith!

2009-10-17T16:54:10Z

I shall write you whatever porn you want, because I'm broke due to hospital fees. :P

Hope you enjoy getting older. XD

curses FFVII

2009-10-15T20:54:30Z

Stupid game is dragging me into the franchise, making me want to buy a PSP just for stupid Crisis Core.

*grumbles*

Halp, someone distract me!

Just Zack

2009-10-15T04:02:38Z

I feel like I'm bursting at the seams trying to organize the thoughts in my brain into some semblance of sane and it's not working. There's just too many different angles that I want to take and too many questions I want to tackle and there's no good way to start. So, instead of trying to organize things, I'm just going to start rambling and hope that I get somewhere.

Is Zack a bit character in the FFVII story?

I get annoyed when I see people belittling Zack's importance as a character in the story of FFVII proper. Too many reviews contain comments about Zack's progress from a "bit character whose only appearance was in a flashback" to "the lead of Crisis Core".

Well, here's the thing: Zack was important in FFVII proper.

At first, it's hard to tell, what with people stating over and over again that the FFVII game is about Cloud and his progress and growth. Only, people seem to forget that the "Cloud" we see at the beginning of the game, and really for over 2/3rds if not more of the game, is not Cloud as he was, but Cloud-who-thinks-he's-Zack. If nothing else, this establishes just how important Zack really was in the story of FFVII.

Yes, much of Cloud's weird obsession with Sephiroth is due to Sephiroth's manipulation and the result of Hojo injecting Jenova cells into him, but a large part of his drive is because Cloud is trying to be Zack on a deeply subconscious level. He's made himself into Zack, so really, what we see was not "Cloud" chasing and fighting and trying and striving, but "Zack" as Cloud remembers him.

Just because we never see much of Zack's looks in FFVII doesn't mean we don't see his character, because that character whom we've been playing for all of disc 1 and the better part of disc 2 (out of a 3 disc game) is Zack. We only start seeing the real Cloud after the mind trip through the lifestream. If that doesn't make one a major character of a game, I don't know what does.

Not only is his importance obvious in the main game, Advent Children Complete also beats it into our heads just how much Zack had been influencing Cloud's behavior. The movie even explicitly made clear that over three years after his death, Cloud still hasn't gotten past the event. Even when he's saved the world many times over, he is still living for Zack's sake. In fact, while he managed to get over Aerith's death by the middle of the movie (as portrayed in his participation with the battle against the Bahamut SIN), it isn't until his ending fight against Sephiroth that Cloud manages to get over Zack's passing.

Of course, by the time of Crisis Core's release, one can pinpoint the exact moment Cloud's mind went from "shy but still trying" to "broken with crazy". That moment? Zack's last breath. This moment unequivocally establishes Zack as a major character in the entire story of FFVII.

Who did Aerith like better?

I totally do not understand how people could think Aerith's emotional attachment to Cloud was greater than her attachment to Zack. How much did Aerith love Zack? Let me count the ways:

Aerith wore the pink ribbon Zack bought her for over 5 years after his disappearance off the face of the earth. Same thing with her trademark pink skirt.
Aerith continued writing letters (eighty-nine of them!) to Zack for 4 consecutive years before giving up on letter writing. Even then, in her last letter, she's still waiting.
Aerith sells flowers because Zack told her it's a good idea and continues selling them until she was dragged into Cloud's adventures, 5 years after Zack's disappearance.
Aerith's "date as payment" idea came from Zack, and she still remembers 5 years after he disappeared. (I cannot seem to emphasize enough of how long she's been remembering him.)
One of the first things Aerith reveals to Cloud is that he reminds her of her first boyfriend. Note: "first boyfriend", not "ex".
The list of 23 things Aerith wants from Zack? To spend a little more time with him, x23. (Also doubles as one of the saddest moments of Crisis Core, second only to Zack dying.)
Even during the Golden Saucer dating sequence, Aerith is still seeing the similarities between Cloud and Zack. Yes, she mentions that she wants to know the real Cloud, but that's because she realized everything that had attracted her to Cloud so far was because he reminded her of Zack.
Aerith and Zack banter like parents regarding how much Cloud is a really big child that she's not ready to have. At this point, the canon pairing of Zack x Aerith is pretty much being shoved down our throats, so the naysayers might as well just accept it, goddamnit!

Stop hating on the hetero!

Okay, I understand for a lot of yaoi fangirls, the existence of Aerith and Tifa are two big obstacles standing between Cloud and whatever yaoi shipping of preference (especially Zack - not even his death is this great of an obstacle). But that doesn't mean one can just...ignore the fact that Cloud did in fact have feelings for both girls and that both girls are in love with Cloud, whatever arguable degree it may be (see the previous section).

First, Aerith, for all that I have argued for her being canonically paired with Zack, also loved Cloud. She supported him when he wanted to ditch her, followed him across the better part of the world on his quest, was clumsily playing matchmaker between him and Tifa, and genuinely caring about the shit that he's going through.

Yes, her initial attraction to Cloud is due to how much he reminds her of Zack, but she sees him as his own person. She even acknowledges this in the kind of important detail that is the Golden Saucer dating scene. Yes, the scene is not set in stone, but it's kind of important to remember that she is the default option for a reason, and that reason being her dialogue with Cloud establishes and solidifies past and present relationships. And Cloud, for all that he is icy and aloof for the first part of the game, was still affected by her death. He still has difficulty letting her go, as Advent Children has amply portrayed.

He lets her go in the end, but that's because there's someone else whose kicking his butt for being an emo git. That person is Tifa.

Tifa gets a pretty huge chunk of bashing from fangirls (and fanboys). Between her and Aerith (y'know, the two major female leads?), they probably account for about 90% of shipping rants, with Yuffie picking up whatever slack directed at her for being too perky. But anyway.

Tifa.

People really need to stop hating Tifa. It's been pretty well established that she likes Cloud, gives a damn about what he's going through, and is the only living person who seems to be capable of getting through to him. She even went spelunking in his fucked up psyche to drag him out of the lifestream, so I would say she plays a pretty damn important part in his life!

Also, Tifa is NOT a jealous bitch who treats her love rivals like shit. I think people are forgetting that Tifa actually likes Aerith, even before she died. She and Aerith often team up against Cloud when he's acting stupid. And when Aerith died, Tifa certainly misses her just as much as everyone else, and even acknowledged the importance of Aerith's spiritual presence by the time of Advent Children. In fact, she's the only other person who sees Aerith and realizes how much Aerith had contributed to getting Cloud back into shape.

Furthermore, her words expose Cloud's personality flaw and lay them bare, forcibly making Cloud face his demons and thus getting him to do anything. Lest we forget, she's the one who observed that "Sure [Cloud] might not answer the phone, but [she doesn't] see [Cloud] throwing it away either!" She also calls Cloud out on his self-pitying ways and delivers a very necessary verbal bitch slap to get Cloud out of his funk. She knows Cloud, no matter how little of him she understood when they were children, and she was still willing to put up with his moping. That takes dedication, people, so stop hating on her!

Who's stronger, Zack or Angeal?

Answer: Zack defeats Angeal and all of his clones. Zack also defeats all of Genesis clones and sort of defeats Genesis-as-final-boss. In short, the only one who gave Zack problems was Sephiroth, so it's probably safe to say that Zack is pretty much one of the strongest characters in game.

Who's stronger, Zack or Cloud?

Answer: Cloud defeats Sephiroth, Zack lost to Sephiroth. I think this is self explanatory.

And then I realize this is slightly more complicated because fanboys over think things.

One of the first arguments against Cloud is that his fights with Sephiroth cannot be used as a benchmark because "Sephiroth wasn't taking him seriously". This is a silly argument as this assumes Sephiroth is taking Zack seriously. And in the two confrontations Zack has against Sephiroth (virtual reality and the real one) involved only some fancy schmancy sword play without any actual spells/magic involved, I would hazard the guess that Sephiroth wasn't taking Zack seriously either.

In addition, Sephiroth managed to not only disarm Zack with one hand, he also used the disarm move to throw Zack out of the room and back down the stairs, injuring Zack enough to the point where he can't actually move anymore. This establishes the superiority Sephiroth has over Zack's ability.

Now, even if we assume that Sephiroth is going all out (without using spells/magic for some reason) against Zack, that still doesn't deny the fights with Sephiroth as reasonable benchmarks for Cloud, simply because we do not have numerical values to determine how serious each fight was, regardless of opponent because we're comparing cut scenes instead of game mechanics. The best we can assume, from a statistical standpoint, is to average the highest for Zack and the lowest for Cloud in an attempt to minimize alpha errors. In other words, we assume Zack and Sephiroth were both fighting at optimal level; Cloud was fighting his best, but Sephiroth was not taking him seriously at all. However, this simply means that Cloud at his best can defeat Sephiroth at his worst, while Zack cannot defeat Sephiroth at his best.

However, we must add to the equation that Cloud was pierced through a vital body part (his lung if not his heart) and still managed to physically dominate Sephiroth (beginner's luck be damned); this bumps up Cloud's achievement while Zack, being in optimal condition, does not receive a similar bump.

What this means: Zack at optimal state cannot beat Sephiroth at optimal state while Cloud at suboptimal state can defeat Sephiroth at suboptimal state. Assuming normal curve for their power distribution, this averages Cloud above or equal to Zack's power, statistically. The math here is fuzzy, but such is the limitation of guestimation.

Finally, at this point in time (at Nibelheim), Zack has received 1 dose of SOLDIER enhancement while Cloud received none. This last part bumps up Cloud's power average yet again while bumping down Zack's. This unequivocally places Cloud's physical power above that of Zack's with all else being equal. What this means is that between a normal Cloud and a normal Zack at the same age with the same years of development and training without any psychological trauma, there is a greater likelihood of Cloud physically dominating over Zack.

Now, some might state that Cloud didn't make the SOLDIER recruitment while Zack was a 1st class at age 16. However, people are forgetting that the reason Cloud failed the recruitment is not because he was physically incapable of becoming a SOLDIER, but because he was psychologically invalid for consideration. This just means that Cloud has a lower psychological tolerance than Zack, but seeing as he got the same treatment in the end, the point is moot anyway.

In short, when all else being equal, Cloud is physically superior to Zack. End of story.

Addendum: However, upon further consideration, Cloud is obviously "fwah fwah" over Zack, so all Zack has to do is give Cloud the puppy eyes and Cloud's wrapped around his pinky finger. Easy win. (Note: this only assumes that the battle is between Cloud and Zack, and not a comparison of their performances against similar enemies. Because I get the feeling if Cloud sees Zack hurt, he powers up super fast. After all, just look at how super powered he got after he saw what Sephiroth did to Zack.)

Edit: OMFG, there's over 28 pages of this debate in a single thread. Fanboy wankage breaks my brain.

Who do you like better, Zack or Cloud?

Okay, I admit that I'm a sucker for fucked up characters. Just look at my list of favorite characters (Subaru, Kamui, Seishirou, Fuuma, Watanuki, TRC!Syaoran-aka-Tsubasa, Shiba, etc.), pretty much all of them are crazy or broken or have been broken somewhere along the way. On the other hand, I also have favorite characters who aren't quite as messed up (Kyouya, Tamaki, Roy Mustang, Maes Hughes, Haruna, etc.), but still have some sort of angsty background story and are teetering on the edge of sane.

However, between Zack and Cloud, I'm going to have to go with Zack.

Now, don't get me wrong, I'm rather sympathetic to Cloud's plight and really like him as I grow to know him more, but the fact remains that Cloud is an emotionally weak character who requires a shit ton of pushing and prodding before he does anything. And while I enjoy such characters (*coughSubarucough*), I have problems with these type of characters saving the world, mostly because usually they don't. (And if you argue that somehow Subaru is saving the world, I laugh in your general direction. But moving on.)

The thing is, Cloud saving the world is greatly facilitated by Zack. Because Zack is the one who wants to be a hero (Cloud just wanted to impress Tifa), he's the one who wanted to do something to help. Zack is simply the more emotionally stronger person.

Because, you see, Zack has gone through just as much as if not more shit than Cloud. He, too, lost an idol, lost a mentor, had half a decade of his life sucked away into the void, and lost people that he loved. However, Zack also knew his mentor for much longer than Cloud (since being in a coma doesn't count towards knowing a person), knew his idol better than Cloud, and genuinely loved his girlfriend, as opposed to, y'know, being ambivalent and hesitant. So each loss hit him much harder on an emotional level.

Oh, and don't forget that Zack had to personally kill his mentor, unlike Cloud who only had to watch the death.

Yet, through all this crap, Zack still doesn't hesitate to call people on their crap (especially with Angeal and Genesis, boy does he ever call them on it), he's still not afraid to keep living instead of just merely existing, and he still holds onto a positive outlook despite the odds being stacked against him. Yes, he died, but he died with a smile, somehow utterly convinced that the emo kid from Nibelheim is going to be able to carry on the legacy of his mentor. And, apparently, in death trusted his girlfriend's well being to this kid.

I mean, seriously, Zack has enough happy to make the world go round. If he'd survived, they probably would've caught Sephiroth way faster in FFVII proper, or at least be less depressing about the entire thing.

Usually the hot-headed, idiotic optimist spunky hero character annoys me, but considering the shit storm that is the FFVII story, Zack's general lack of emo is greatly appreciated. That's not to say Zack can't emote when it's proper, but he saves his sadness for when it's warranted, instead of being bum fuck crazy or down in the dumps the entire time. A breath of fresh air and all that. That he can also be a dork about it also helps.

(Kind of like how I can like Subaru and his emotionally more upbeat sister Hokuto at the same time. On the other hand, I'm fairly certain Hokuto is bum fuck crazy, too, so that puts a dent in my analogy.)

In short, Zack is the superior character, and not just because his personality is the driving force for the first two discs of the main FFVII game.

Zack x Cloud?

After all that rambling, my point is this: Zack is the reason Cloud lives and not just alive. Cloud promised Zack to remember his teachings and live for both of them, and that is the driving force behind both his new personality in FFVII and his emo depression of Advent Children. Yes, Aerith contributed to it, but as I mentioned earlier, his issue with regards to Zack's death lasts far longer and had a far greater impact on him.

I understand that Cloud and Zack are both shipped with other people (male or female) and that they all have very good canonical reasons to be shipped. However, for me, it's Zack x Cloud all the way, because they have something that they can't establish with other people, and that is the shared misery and experience, both in losing a mentor and being under torture against their will. They both know what it feels like to lose an idol, they both know what it feels like to strive for something that seems far too out of reach, they both try their best to save the world (whatever it may entail), and they both understand what it means to work for your happy ending.

(Admittedly, had Zack actually survived, Cloud wouldn't have needed to learn quite a few of his life lessons, which is kind of paradoxical in that it is precisely because Zack died on Cloud that makes me like this pairing so much. I fail.)

Further, Zack compliments Cloud and vice versa. Zack is outgoing, laid back, optimistic, and generally doesn't over think things. Cloud, on the other hand, is reclusive, up tight, pessimistic, and over think everything to the point of indecisiveness. Although their interactions were limited, we can see how deeply they compliment each other from what we do know. Cloud shows that he is a reminder to Zack as to why he's fighting the good fight, and we've been given ample evidence of Zack being the single largest driving force behind Cloud's will to live.

Furthermore, unlike with Angeal, Zack doesn't serve solely to mentor Cloud. Yes, Zack does use the buster sword in memory of Angeal, but at the same time, he makes his own damn memories and legends and finds his own reason to live. On the other hand, he is Cloud's reason to live and Cloud not only wields Zack's dream and pride, he also wields his enthusiasm for life (or what little of it he could muster post-Zack's death).

Furthermore (getting repetitive here), Cloud also serves to give Zack a reason to be the hero he so desperately wants to be, and in that sense, gives Zack a reason to struggle and strive and work his butt off. Many argue that it is for Aerith's sake that Zack struggles his way to Midgar, but if that were the case, why should he risk life and limb for the dead weight that is Cloud? Why should he give his life for Cloud when he was most likely less than a mile away from seeing Aerith? Cloud wasn't just a "mentee" for Zack, he was Zack's drive to live.

(As an aside: Zack's death is actually a mirror image of Angeal's. Where Angeal forced Zack's hand to essentially assist in suicide, Zack did the exact opposite - actively run into a suicidal defense of Cloud's life. In this sense, Zack showed far more care and connection to his mentee than his mentor to him, and convinces me that Zack's connection to Cloud is more of a two-way street than his connection to Angeal. He had affection for Angeal, yes, but I'm not so sure that affection was returned, and if returned not on as great of a degree, as it was with Cloud.)

And that...concludes this rambling session. @_@